star – january

January 9, 2013

the flock year

In January, Rachelle Mee Chapman provides an Epiphany meditation for her Flock. It is a profound experience. At the end of the meditation, you receive a star and the star gives you a guiding word to see you through the year.
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Last year my star whispered Peace to me. Initially I didn’t like it. It bothered me. Such a big word. What was I to do with it? All was revealed with the circle finally closing in December.
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This year, my star is a star. I didn’t get a word.
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At first I was perplexed. Where is my word? I looked around for it but it was nowhere to be found.
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All I had was this stone star. It is the texture of pumice but it is weighty, as big as my torso. A four-pointed star, big enough to hug. It has something inside, I can feel its’ warmth. A flame, a heart?
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Hold me in your palm
hard, granite-grainy
cold on my own,
but warm from your skin.
Turn me over,
touch each spiny point,
name each one
round and round
until everything you need
is spoken aloud.
Now wait
and watch as my sisters
arch their way
across the sky.
For one day,
I too shall crack open wide
and reveal to you
the sparkle inside.
 
Rachelle Mee Chapman
 
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In June last year, I received a guided meditation from Natasha Reilly of Creative Nachos. It was a landscape meditation in which you were given a gift. I wrote after the meditation…

“I was in the forest. Dappled light. Reverence for the trees. I came upon a clearing, a meadow. The breeze was cool and warm at the same time – comforting but refreshing. The grass was thick and soft and white flowers were blooming throughout the grass. My gift was a live beating heart. Anatomically correct with the valves, veins, arteries. It was red, soft and squidgey, and warm. I wondered how I should hold it. I was curious as to its meaning but I placed it on my belly as I lay down. And then I forgot about it as I melted into the landscape and my being melded with the trees. I became a tree.”

This is the work that I have been doing since – looking for places and experiences where I could feel and hear the beating of my heart.

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
Rumi

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For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream.
Vincent van Gogh
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